Just sit right back and I'll reveal the ongoing TRUE saga of my experiences with the Zune customer service, aka The Twilight Zune.
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Sun April 14, 2007 14:33 central time. My wife and I purchase a Zune player for $270.61 ($249.99 + sales tax) at Best Buy #204 at 4970 W Hwy 290 in Austin, TX, 78735, 512-892-7550 for our son’s 16th birthday. He is elated on April 17.
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On Sun December 16, 2007 (please note that the Zune player was purchased barely 8 months prior). The Hold button malfunctions, and the player is now stuck in the locked position. After it powers itself off, there is no way to turn it on. This is where the NIGHTMARE begins!
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Wed Dec 19, 2007. I log on to zune.net for the first time ever, and proceed to register the device, which is required before I can start the procedure for having it serviced under warranty. As soon as I enter the serial number (directly off the player), the website tells me this Zune is out of warranty as of 11/28/07 6:59:59pm, and tells me I need to contact Zune at 877-GET-ZUNE. (And the NIGHTMARE deepens.)
I call the number, go through the menu listening to Ultra-Cool-Guy (more on UCG later), and I finally get to talk to someone named Marvin. After quite some time on the phone trying to make Marvin understand that the device on only 8 months old, he finally concedes that fact and says that someone registered it on Nov 28, 2006, and that it must have been Best Buy that registered it. (NIGHTMARE realization #1: That retailers might register products before they're even sold! Ludicrous!). After a lot of back-and-forth, Marvin finally agrees to let me ship it to the repair facility. He sets up the case, gives me a case number (my first case number for this issue, more on that later), and even gives me a FedEx tracking number. With all that done, I’m feeling pretty good. Then he hits me with the caveat - NIGHTMARE realization #2: The repair can only be done IF (and only if) I give him a credit card number so they can charge the shipping and repair costs, but naturally they’ll credit it back later after they verify the actual date of the purchase of my Zune player. I, of course, refuse to give Marvin a credit card; he can’t understand why I won’t do that and tells me there's nothing else he can do. I frantically offer to fax him a copy of the Best Buy receipt or whatever he needs; but Marvin is not negotiating. I’m dead in the water.
I ask to speak to a supervisor, so Marvin connects me to Kristin. Kristen sounds to be young (probably in her twenties) and is very sweet, and proceeds to tell me that Microsoft (not Zune) must correct the registration date for the device, and once that is done, then they (Zune) can repair it. Kristen suggests that I’d likely be able to simply fax them a copy of my Best Buy receipt, and then everything would be hunky-dory.
But isn't this Microsoft I'm talking to? (NIGHTMARE realization #3: That the company that makes Zune is not part of Microsoft. This is a fact.) After quite a bit of digging on her part, Kristin finally comes up with a phone number for Microsoft - 1-800-426-9400. (NIGHTMARE realization #4: Kristin admits to me that they (Zune) don’t even have a number for Microsoft, that the number she is giving me is simply Microsoft’s main phone number, who knows of what paths it will lead?). (NIGHTMARE realization #5: Could this be buck-passing? No, certainly Zune, let alone sweet Kristen, would not stoop to lowly buck-passing.)
Phone time: 49 minutes.
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Thu 12/20/2007, lunch hour. I know that I'm going to have to send Zune a copy of the receipt, but the ink on my 8-month-old Best Buy receipt has faded to the point that it is not readable, let alone copy‑able (NIGHTMARE realization #6: I am not sending my only copy of my purchase receipt to Zune, especially after what I’ve already been through.) I make a trip during my lunch hour to Best Buy to see what they can do for me. After waiting in line at the customer service desk (NIGHTMARE realization #7: It is 5 days before Christmas, and I'm trying to get customer service at Best Buy?), I talk with a rep who is sympathetic but can't really help me. She calls over Jeremy, I guess who is some higher-level customer service guy. Jeremy is also somewhat sympathetic, but mostly rags on me about not having bought the Best Buy extended warranty on the device (which only serves to make me even more sure that I NEVER buy one, or maybe not even come into another Best Buy). He also can’t do anything to really help me except give me yet a different number for Microsoft, 800-642-7676, which he very easily came up with. However, one constructive step does occur; he is able to print me out a duplicate copy of the original purchase receipt. I have him make 2 duplicate prints, one to send to Zune some day soon, and the other for me to replace my faded out original.
Time at Best Buy: About 45 minutes + travel time, approx another 30 minutes.
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Thu 12/20/2007, early evening - phone call #1 to Microsoft (via the number that Jeremy at Best Buy had recommended, 800-642-7676). You’ll recall that Kristin had told me I needed to call Microsoft to get them to change the registration date for my Zune. I thought I might have better luck with Jeremy’s number for MS rather than Kristin’s (he had come up with it so easily that I figured it must be a direct hotline for Best Buy). But this number turns out to be some generic technical support hotline. I speak with someone who tells me the warranty information must be changed by the “Order Desk Dept.”. They then attempt to transfer me to that department, but the call drops. (NIGHTMARE realization #8: Conveniently dropped call? Methinks something is afoul.)
Phone time: 23 minutes (before the dropped call).
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Thu 12/20/2007, minutes later - phone call #2 to Microsoft. This time I am really thinking; I reason that sweet Kristin must have been correct with the number she gave me and call it, 800-426-9400. It turns out to be the Microsoft main sales number. On the phone menu, I select 1 (Home User), followed by 1 again (Technical Support). Randy, the Customer Support Agent, answers the call. He tells me that Zune should handle this, not Microsoft. I relay the information that Kristen gave me. Randy finally suggests I call the Microsoft corporate headquarters at 425-882-8080 and talk to pre-sales. (NIGHTMARE realization #9: Now, even Microsoft sales department is passing the buck, after all, I’ve already bought the product, what do they need with me?)
Phone time: 12 minutes.
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Thu 12/20/07, mere moments later – phone call #3 to Microsoft. I call the Microsoft main number at 425-882-8080 and go through yet another menu. (NIGHTMARE realization #10: This appears to not even be a toll-free number.) I select what I think is pre-sales (recall that Randy told me just mere moments ago that I needed pre-sales). I finally speak with Donna in Licensing and Pre-Sales. Donna is extremely helpful (and I’m not being facetious). She convinces me that sweet little Kristin was incorrect, that Microsoft cannot change the registration date; that it quite simply must be done by Zune. (NIGHTMARE realization #11: I’m crushed that Kristin led me astray.) Donna is so helpful that she agrees to get Zune on the phone with us while she sits in the background. We go through the Zune rigmarole to get a person on the line, Ulysses (I’m not making this up), who promptly proceeds to tell us again (even knowing that Donna is on the line) that the registration update must be handled by Microsoft – but Donna corrects this guy pronto-like! Donna also introduces me to the concept of “aliases” when asks she asks Ulysses for his alias. Aliases are apparently one of Microsoft’s methods of internally tracking people without giving out real names, emails, or phone numbers. She makes Ulysses say his alias over the phone (and I jot it down), and then she gives me hers as well.
Ulysses (with Donna still on the line), is, however, finally able to make a GIANT break-through and tells me and my new best buddy Donna that he will be able to approve the repair (without a credit card). He assigns me a new case number (case number 2, if you’re counting). They will FedEx an empty shipping box to me, which will take 3-5 days (for them to overnight the box to me?). When it arrives, all I have to do is put the Zune player device in the box, along with a copy of the receipt (which I’ve already got a fresh duplicate of – thanks to Best Buy and my magnificent forethought to get them). (NIGHTMARE realization #12: Maybe the nightmare is coming to an end and I’ll wake up soon? Yayyy! Ha!!!).
Phone time: 49 minutes.
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Wed 12/26/07, the day after Christmas. No box has yet arrived, but we head out of town for a Christmas visit to family 3 hours away in Houston.
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Sat 12/29/07, late evening. We return to Austin from Houston. The box awaits us! Hurray!! Things are starting to happen now.
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Mon 12/31/07. I carefully follow the enclosed instructions; pack up the Zune player in the provided FedEx box, enclose the clearly readable duplicate Best Buy receipt, and ship it out from a nearby FedEx/Kinko’s store. The good folks at Kinko’s tell me that New Year’s Day is a holiday; the package will be delivered on 1/2/08. That sounds good to me.
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Wed 1/2/08. I check the tracking number on the website. It was delivered today at 11:51 am central time, and signed for by M. Jones. Bless you M. Jones, I could hug you! I will have my repaired or replaced Zune in 10-15 days. The NIGHTMARE is coming to an end. Or is it?
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Wed 1/9/08. It’s been there a week; I’ll log on to zune.net/repair and check the status. The status says, “Waiting for Device at Service Center” and still says “Out of Warranty”. Noooooo!! Surely this is some kind of mistake. I check FedEx again; yes, the tracking information still says they delivered it on 1/2/08, signed by M. Jones.
NIGHTMARE realization #13: I’m going to have to call 877-GET-ZUNE again. Will this be the time that I go crazy listening once again to Ultra Cool Guy? UCG says, “Hey thanks for calling Zune customer support. Many common questions can be resolved by visiting zune.net. If you’ve already tried that, a support agent is ready to help. To make sure you receive great service, we might monitor or record this call. Main Menu: To find out where to purchase a Zune, press 1; Where to download Zune software, press 2; How to get your computer to detect your device, press 3, If your Zune isn’t responding, press 4, For Zune originals, press 5. To hear this menu again, press 8. Or hang on for help with anything else.”
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Thu 1/10/08, about 9:00am. I nervously pick up the phone, dial the now infamous number to Zune (now what is it, 1-877-GET-ZUNE, what does that spell? I’m so fervent that I simply can’t spell the phone number on the dial; I’ll have to convert it to old-fashioned numbers. Oh yes, now I’ve got it; 1-877-438-9863). And yep, there’s UCG with his ultra-cool spiel. I don’t dare press a number; I’ll just hang on like UCG recommended. Elliot picks it up. Elliot is very, very sympathetic to my plight. He can’t believe that my Zune has been sitting in McAllen, TX for over a week now and no one, not even M. Jones, has done anything with it. He frantically looks through the computer files, looks up the tracking number at FedEx.com; yep, FedEx did their job! Elliot tells me he’s going to fix things up by, creating a “bug” and “escalating” to “Tier 3”. (NIGHTMARE realization #14: Isn’t Microsoft famous for bugs? I don’t think I want a bug.) Elliot creates yet another case reference number (this is number 3, in case you’re still counting, and in case you’re still awake at this point), and tells me that someone from the escalation office will call me within 2 days, which would mean by the end of the day Friday. (NIGHTMARE realization #15: I’m getting my hopes up yet again.)
Phone time: 46 minutes.
(Continued in the next post. The board won't allow this large a posting in a single post; something about 20000 character maximum, even though Word says the entire document is only a little over 16,000 characters total.)
